Queasiness

I woke up this morning feeling overwhelmed by and about life. Overwhelmed by how innately Aries I am, in the most absurd sense of it – how impulsively I am ramming myself through things and then suddenly feeling the entire weight of the situation when I come around to seeing where I have reached. Ouch.

Nothing too serious, I just need to sort myself out, and to realise the point my recklessness has brought me to, which in retrospect is not too bad. Not bad at all, in fact. Haha. Looking from another perspective, I should be applauding myself for following my heart and pushing myself so far, rather than overthinking and holding myself back. šŸ™‚ Cool, I love writing, it is like a reconciliation of all the conflicting aspects within myself. ā¤

Reconciliation also in the sense that I am trying to look at the “bimbotism” in me and trying to reconcile it with the “capable” aspect. It is a strange notion, and I am having problems trying to pull these facets together in a comprehensive understanding of my human existence. It is rather funny, as in ha-ha-funny, in that I cannot understand why I am always at a total loss when it comes to using any devices (computers, printers, phones, etc) yet I can come up with the weirdest of solutions that work. I do not know if I am (or my poor colleagues are) getting tired of the “am I online? am I in the group yet?” and “how do I log out?” or “I don’t see it …. ” Well, I am trying, and I guess I get some credit for that, although I would prefer to get full credits for successfully achieving something rather than for trying something.

Wistfulness aside, maybe I should just enjoy the fact that I’m a little bit of entertainment and fresh air from the mundane clockwork tasks.

I wish. šŸ˜‰

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