Last weekend was a curious weekend. I sort of “dropped” my right shoulder and could not move it, and had to go for tuina late on Friday night. Fortunately my neighbourhood had 24hour massage places, and we found one that revived my sleepy arm. The next day was that weird Saturday when I cried the whole day and I had absolutely no idea why, just plainly overwhelmed with emotions that I don’t (I still don’t) know what.
Coincidentally, Teacher Shirley was going to have her Kundalini Reiki level 1 class on Sunday, so I asked to join for the day. I did mine about 4 years ago, and normally do not “retake” classes. It was a curious weekend at class too! There were 4 others who came to re-attend KR L1 too, and there was just 1 new student.
I was very sleepy in class after a puffy-eyed previous day, and was constantly at the verge of dozing off. It is sort of a norm for me to be zoned out when I do “energy work”, especially Sacred Activations, but not so much for Reiki. I admittedly told Shirley my eyes were falling asleep but I was really paying attention to her. Haha, so that I was how I provoked her into having me co-teach the class that day. 😀 It would keep me awake, she said.
It really felt very very different standing at the teacher position. It started with me just helping to jot down points of discussion with the class. Then me being me, just starting throwing in many concepts and comments and tips, and ended up facilitating / teaching / sharing. It was fun! I was awake much of the day after that! Guess it really helped that we all know one another from doing so much reiki, meditation, yoga together, that I felt comfortable being in that position.
It really takes learning, training and practice to pick something up. Plus a lot of determination too. Years ago, I used to brush that “weakness” aside, and convinced myself to play it small, play second fiddle, and hide behind some veils of unworthiness. Until one day, I had to speak in front of 400 people, and in Mandarin, that I knew this was something I really had to deal with and cannot run away from any longer. I made it a point then to brace myself to speak in public, and started looking for avenues to overcome whatever I was afraid of and holding me back. That was partly how I started my journey with Thetahealing because it was really pulling out and releasing all the old beliefs that no longer serve me. I needed something more empowering, I needed something that I could help me live up to my life purpose and my highest potential, and I knew that there is something bigger than me than the little girly being I was and chose to be.
With intent, with action, and with good attitude (and of course with a good grasp of what is in sync with Universe’s intent too), whether knowingly or unknowingly, we will start aligning ourselves onto the journey we are meant to. We can always choose to move otherwise, but being out of alignment will also mean much inner / internal conflicts. Or maybe even external obstacles, because out of Universe’s great Love for us, He will always try to guide (obstacles = signposts!) us towards what is in the Flow of our highest good.
Years ago, this scene of me standing there in that position was unthinkable. But I triumphed! 🙂 Years ago, you reading my writing here was unthinkable too. ❤