I can’t focus when my mom is free! Normally her foci are on the double-O-bros, but when she has her hands and eyes free from them, it shifts to anyone of us – mostly between my bro and I, whoever’s at home with the room door wide open. Our theory is that because she has dedicated her entire life to us / family, she actually feels bad (Super warped guilt trips) that she isn’t spending much time / focus on us. Hahahaha. And also that we are hardly around – in Singapore, or at home.

Today I was tinkering with some furnishing in my room and sweating buckets, this needing full ventilation with doors and windows all wide open. And … drumroll. She stood at my door watching me work. I had to tell her she’s blocking my wind. 😀 ouch, but I really need the wind even though I have been towelling myself.

Just a couple of weeks back, I laughed so hard when I saw my dad the secret Santa elf working surreptitiously in the kitchen. He was sooooo quiet. And he hushed me, cos he had to quickly finish his project before my mom came home. “She has so many comments. If she doesn’t see me doing this, she won’t even realise it exists.” Hahaha. Mom saw much later in the day and asked if it was for me. Dad just kept quiet and nodded. Ah well, we use each other as shields and have our own bro-code. Anyway, it was a freezer my dad built on top of our current fridge. Now it is filled with her fish for our Chinese New Year stock-up. 😀 dad built it for this purpose actually, but we really have no idea what kind reactions (possibly complaints!), so it’s better to just keep very quiet about it and just let her assume it’s for me. Like what, frozen kefir juice? Heehee.

So I escaped the house this evening with dad’s iPad so I can work on some write-up of my “messy” (or rather extremely fluid) journey through life, landing myself in this state of non-definitive but very fulfilling state of being. So yes, i really have to focus to bring some clarity to myself so I can convey it to others. Wish me luck!

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