When I first started meditation, I was only fourteen, and did not even understand this term at all. I would always take some 5-minute timeouts when the world got too overwhelming for me. It was more of an excuse “I need to close my eyes” and not be disturbed by the other excitable girls.
“Real” meditation started twelve years later when I picked up Usui Reiki. It was a rather hush-hush thing in those days, not at all open and trendy as it is now. Class was taught in Mandarin, and I felt like I was in some old folks’ qigong class (qigong had always been a fad for the retired silver hair generation).
So, my meditation started out in the form of “imagination” – the teacher would guide us on what to imagine. I remember the ending was always having us sit on a ball, which is planet earth, and imagine ourselves being the little universe and planet earth as the big universe. I don’t know if it’s my very poor memory, or very poor understanding of what was going on, but as I write this out now, I can spot so many flaws in that storyline. I have very good reason to believe it was my poor comprehension, of either the concept or the language or both, because now and then when some revelations hit me, they could well be my realisations of what the teacher was talking about.
Years passed, and I guess I started reading a lot more books and also picking up the more appropriate terms used. “Imagination” progressed to “visualisation”. Or maybe there really is the subtle difference. I see it as imagination being something conjured from the mind, while visualisation has added dimensions to it. The former feels very 2D, while the latter feels like sound-surround. There is a spatial dimension, like we could be hovering in the middle of the universe, and can feel the stillness of the vacuum all around. At the same time, there is also a time dimension to it, which I find very difficult to describe. For example, it can span the different generations of our ancestors, or different time periods of our past lives, or even different years of our current lives.
In recent years, a new term surfaced in my dictionary – “witnessing”. Visualisation is what comes out from me, while witnessing comes down from Creator. I normally pose my questions, and then pause all inputs from myself, and just “witness” what Creator wants to show me. Well, it really takes a lot of trust and faith, not just in Him, but in myself to not “imagine” or throw in some ego-filled visualisation of what I want to see. It is not exactly a matter of “self-control” because the point is to actually relinquish control, to step aside and witness His wisdom.
Oh wow. Wow. Not bad. Not bad at all. I did not realise how much I have progressed. Hmmm… 😀 😀 This is cool. 😀 😀 I love Universe all over again. ❤ ❤